Photo by Robert Lukeman on Unsplash

Is it selfish to focus on healing my personal trauma? Shouldn’t I care more about people who have it far worse? The very question comes from the heart of a spiritual warrior, someone whose history makes them acutely aware of injustices done to other people. Such a person is primed to question the status quo. The good news is that healing from personal trauma is an intensely social, even a political act.

Healing is a movement from isolation to connection. As psychotherapist Matt Licata, PhD, points out, virtually all trauma involves relational wounding. Someone we should have been able to…

Photo by June Liu on Unsplash

My son Frank hasn’t lived at home for more than ten years. My daughter Charity, quite a bit younger, is catching up with that span of time. During their most recent visit home, I had to explain how to turn on the stove since we remodeled the kitchen recently and have a fancy new digital flat-glass cooktop.

“Oh, you have to press the ‘on’ icon really hard,” my son told her, ever helpful. Actually, you don’t. The icon reads the heat in your finger, but it takes a few tries to feel that out. “Sheesh!” my daughter replied, shooting me…

Photo by Nad X on Unsplash

“Where is your anger?” My husband Steve asks me. He’s been a phenomenal support to my healing from a sexual assault that happened when I was very young, but I never had a much of an answer. I simply didn’t feel the rage he thought I should feel.

When I was little, we didn’t see my mother’s adult male relative often — he lived in another country — but I adored him. Brock was exciting and fun, and he drenched me with buckets of attention that my parents were too distracted and uptight to render.

On the Saturday morning in…

Photo by Irene Giunta on Unsplash

I’m writing this as an experiment in human connection. It’s about shame, the force that severs connection between me and other people, between me and the divine. It’s about my slow, aching turn toward home. Shame told me I didn’t have a spiritual home. Healing is leading me, slowly, hesitant step by misstep, by failure, by rising, by decades, to come out. To come out as myself. Home is found in the parts of “me” I long ago abandoned because of shame.

I write with respect for the sacredness of my own humanity, and I reach toward the hearts of…

Photo by Bruce Warrington on Unsplash

“Every child,” said the great Flemish painter Peter Paul Rubens, “has the spirit of creation. The rubbish of life often exterminates the spirit through plague and a soul’s own wretchedness.”

In the almost-500 years since Rubens was born in 1577, we’ve gained a few things: For one, it’s easy to dig up obscure facts. So: Artists in his day didn’t expect to live much longer than 40 years. Covid-19 may have kicked our ass, but on average, we in the US have till age 75 to work things out.

That’s progress, but we’ve lost something along the way. The Old…

Photo by Christian Liebel on Unsplash

Welcome to the May, 2021 edition of our newsletter.

What a complicated world we live in!

Home for Good Coalition is dedicated to embracing complexity — For those of us who make up its core team, this means we’re dedicated to the relational complexity of addressing and supporting one another as we heal our own trauma. We do this because we know how connected we are to the larger community.

We do this because we know that trauma, and healing from trauma, is at the heart of changing the structures of so-called “helping systems.”

We do this because in fact…

Original Graphic Courtesy of The Center for Story Based Strategy

The Civil Rights movement created a new era of legal equality in the United States, but racism and injustice merely shape-shifted into new forms to accommodate the letter of those laws. As Ibram Kendi writes, “Racial disparities persisted after the (Civil Rights) law was passed because discriminatory policies persisted under a patina of colorblindness… America is still hemorrhaging from the racism of police bullets, health disparities and environmental catastrophes. The black unemployment rate has been twice the white unemployment rate for 60 years.”

Equality’s a good thing — until you see how a small child standing on his equally-sized box…

Photo by Ahmed Hasan on Unsplash

This first appeared on the Association for Spiritual Integrity blog. Used by permission.

Try telling a goldfish that it’s wet. Assuming you speak its fishy language, it’ll probably say you’re nuts. The water it depends on is so inextricable from its goldfish self that it can’t perceive water as a separate thing.

It’s like what the spiritual teacher Adyashanti says about enlightenment. Our consciousness is our arena for awakening, yet consciousness so permeates our being that we can’t feel or grasp it. We can’t experience how obvious enlightenment is until our preconceptions are utterly confounded. …

Photo by Ilya Schulte on Unsplash

We in America are quietly assaulted with messages generated by an industry behemoth. The estimated worth of the mindfulness industry is projected to be 2 billion this year. “Spirituality” is cool. It’s a catchall term, covering everything from yoga as a fitness modality to the most austere Buddhist practice. What used to be dismissed as “New Age” is now mainstream. Christian churches don’t just rent their community rooms to outside meditation teachers, along with AA chapters. Now they encourage meditation, albeit with a Christian spin. The domain of “religion” is popularly understood as focusing on outward conformity, rules, and ethics…

Helen W. Mallon: On Healing and Spirituality

Years of healing, years of spiritual seeking. Together, they bring transformation. Co-Editor, Collective Power

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store